I look at your ruffled features
So similar to my own
And I think to myself
How very difficult it is to
Watch you grow away from me

We’re in a constant state
Of tug of war these days
You want your freedom and independence
Yet I pull you back from the edge

The pressure to be the parent you deserve
-To do the right thing-
Keeps me up at night
Especially after we’ve argued

It’s a precarious balancing act
And I don’t know
When I’m being too hard
Or too soft on you

But my dearest child
I wouldn’t trade one moment
Of this crazy ride for anything
Even though
We push and pull against one another
Like tides against the shore

Do you know what the
Hardest part of being
Your mommy is I ask

What
Dealing with me
You reply defiantly

My heart seizes in my throat
For I can’t imagine life without you
No, I reply
That’s the easy part